Because I know you've all been waiting to read my name YET AGAIN in the newspaper

Thanks to Andrea for giving me the heads up on this article by Susan Allan (who financed my waffle at Fran's last Saturday morning during a blogger group interview, so hey, she's a Good Egg in my book) that appeared in today's Ottawa Citizen, titled "Mamapalooza: The host of the world's largest conference on mothering is deeply worried about the generation of children we're raising." The article is a very good one and focuses on Andrea O'Reilly and the fabulous work of ARM. Sadly, you have to be a subscriber to read the full-thing (bloody CanWest!) and given that the lawyers I bug for pro bono copyright advice probably do not wish to bugged on the weekend, I don't want to reprint the whole thing. But I will pull out the bit about me (because, after all, it's all about me me me and I really need to live up to this t-shirt)

"Three million are online right now," according to one conference abstract. In stolen minutes at the keyboard mothers diarize, disclose and discuss episodic and ephemeral moments in child rearing.

Some say mommy blogging is a radical act that gives voice to all mothers, or at least to those who have access to a computer. Others, including a subsequently blogged-about New York Times writer, dismiss the web diaries as "online shrines to self-absorption."

Jen Lawrence, a Toronto mother who writes MUBAR (Mothered Up Beyond All Recognition), participated in one of a couple of panels on the rise of the weblog. She suggests the "momosphere" is a place where women can challenge myths of motherhood and discuss previously taboo subjects like depression and maternal anger. "Blogging may be one of the tools that brings about the much promised mothering revolution."

Andrea O'Reilly has yet to be convinced.

"It's very therapeutic, but I don't think its revolutionary," she says. "They critique the consequences of new momism -- isolation, exhaustion, doing all the work -- but they're not then stepping back and saying, 'Why is this?' It's a discourse of complaint, not one of change."

She wishes, for starters, that they were talking about child care. "It's fallen off the table and that's my frustration," she says. "With respect to the bloggers and the mommy lit, they've hijacked the debate."

At first I thought, "Oh man, that's kind of harsh." But I do get her point. There has been lots of discussion about the "the rise of the amateur" as it pertains to blogging and journalism: There is a worry that bloggers are billing themselves as news providers without paying any attention to the code of ethics that keeps journalists honest and trustworthy. Ditto for academia, where one's ideas are constantly questioned and tested to ensure their validity -- at least I assume this is justification for making would-be PhDs defend their dissertation before they can go around calling themselves Doctor. The blogosphere, of course, is subject to no such rigour. Bloggers do not have to be ethical, smart, fair, balanced, nice or even sane. They do not have to do their research or look at historical precendent (during our blogging panel at ARM, Judith Stadtman Tucker of The Mothers Movement Online urged us to look at what mothers of previous generations did so that we do not end up reinventing the wheel instead of pushing forward). They do not have to return gifts, or turn down free meals. They do not have to cite their sources. And so I see why, to a seasoned academic, reading some of the mommy blogs that purport to be the Voice of Mothers Everywhere! or some such thing, is deeply troubling.

For me, it only emphasizes the need for some sort of blogging momifesto, a set of loose guidelines to which we can choose to adhere -- or not -- to help preserve the great things about blogging. The parenting mainstream media has for the most part been co-opted already (Allan includes a brilliant bit on the Today's Parent sponsored Baby And Toddler Show, which took place in Toronto the same weekend as the ARM conference: "The show website promised would-be visitors a chance to "shop, learn and have fun within one vibrant place celebrating parenthood." One click away, it guaranteed exhibitors a place to target moms. "...By attending the event they are giving you permission to SELL TO THEM."")

Those of us who believe in the blogosphere (and on some days, I still do) need to protect it even if it means some reigning in some of our freedoms, putting a stop to the potential gravy train and hearing some challenging words directed our way. And, yes, continuing to blog about important social issues like the need for universal daycare even if, at times, we feel that yet another post about Tara Reid is what our readers are urging us to write.

(More about the Momifesto will be explored on our blogging panel's companion piece on The Whole Mom in mid-November).

Comments

[Sandy D.]

Damn, I wish I could have been at that conference.

I've been thinking that the best avenue for radical change as opposed to complaint are group blogs (perhaps like The Whole Mom, or LiteraryMama, etc.), or maybe blog carnivals - non-commercial, edited, group efforts, aimed at a defined set goals.

PS Your eloquent post on "the gravy train" kept me off it. For the moment, anyway. I was weakening with some recent household expenses and with Google's ad dept. moving to my neighborhood, but hadn't really thought out the consequences of accepting a paltry amount of money for advertising on my blog. So thanks for that. :-)

[andrea from the fishbowl]

Ultimately I think you're right and Andrea is less right.

"Blogging may be one of the tools that brings about the much promised mothering revolution." [Yes!]

Andrea O'Reilly has yet to be convinced.

"It's very therapeutic, but I don't think its revolutionary.... a discourse of complaint, not one of change."

Blogs, because of their "viral" nature are ideal for discussing big issues and bringing change.

There are so many different kinds of mommy blogs.

Not everyone can be an intellectual. Not everyone SHOULD be an intellectual (how boring would that be?)Blogs range from the "cute blogs" of the women who have avatars for every member of their family and post about mundate diaper developments AND then there's the other side of the spectrum: the clearninghouse for Katrina, Annika, sending toys to children in Iraq ... raising awareness on all kinds of issues etc etc There are people particpating in intelligent discourse of all kinds.

Yes. There are a lot of people who use this medium to vent and complain... as you said before, for "cheap therapy." But I'd also say a lot of people using it to fight for some kind of change. And it is unfair to say otherwise.